Welp...There's 90 Minutes I'll Never Get Back

Where oh where do I start with this one...

I cannot think of a single good thing to say about the way I wasted two perfectly good hours on Saturday night...other than...that $5 coke wasn't half bad.

After a long week, and a pretty hectic Saturday, boo and I went to the movies...I let him pick. Of course, I have veto power over any selection. But...he picked Love Guru, and much to eventual dismay, I approved.

Love Guru is on my short short short list of top two awful movies. I don't know what else is on the list with it, but I'm pretty sure I've seen something else that sucked just as bad if not worse. If I can't think of anything...then Love Guru takes the number 1 spot hands-down.

When I say this movie is stupid...it is an insult to all stupid people and things. Now I know I'm a bit of a stiff when it comes to certain things...but I can appreciate a good silly movie from time to time. I mean two of my absolute favorite movies are Napoleon Dynamite and Beer Fest. But apparently that's right about where I draw the silly line.

The highlight of the movie for me was the cameo of one of my total faves...Mariska Hargitay of Law & Order SVU fame. And I can see her on TNT or NBC anytime day or night for free, in the comfort of my own home, drinking my $1.19 bottle of coke, snuggled up with my schnookems, playing on the internet. But I digress...

I shoulda known 3 minutes into the movie that it was best to leave before it got ugly, when Mike Meyers strummed out some faux-Indian-accented version of 9 to 5 with elephants and ethnic women in mini-skirts dancing in the background. From midgets (ahem...little people) to fart humor, to absolutely terrible "jokes" (which I use loosely), to a completely wack plot, that 90 minutes could not end soon enough.

We walked out of the theater in absolute silence...walking like we just didn't know what to say or do after what we just witnessed. My silence was pretty much from the shock of seeing that treacherous production...and partly because I didn't want him to feel bad for making me endure that torture. I don't know if boo was trying to save face after picking a terrible movie or if he thought I hadn't yet formed an opinion, but on the way out of the theater he breaks our silence and says "that wasn't that bad." I just laughed (for the first time in almost 2 hours) and said...we don't even need to discuss this night ever again. This was something that is truly best left in the past. We will just pretend like it never happened.